A mother has defended her choice of Netflix viewing after being branded ‘cringy as hell’ by eldest son.
Dippy 16 told The Daily Grief: “I’d just set foot inside the front door when Mum pounched eager to engage in conversation with me. The last thing I wanted, after nothing more than one long, boring day at Prison school, was to answer her rapid firing of questions let alone hear about her latest choice of Netflix viewing!
Cringy as Hell
A source close to the family told reporters how Dippy 16, with mutterings of ridiculous & no one her age watches it, looked visibly shocked when his Mum asked: ‘have you watched that Sex Education on Netflix”?
Worse still, she asked if he “fancied watching it with her”!
The mother-of-four explained how she’d started watching “Sex Education” after it was highly recommended by a person over the age of 40!
“I thought the kids might fancy watching it with me,” she told reporters. “How was I to know they’d already watched it all”?
“I was hoping to indulge in some family time, you know bonding over Netflix. It helps me feel I’m fulfilling my role as a parent in ‘spending quality time together’.
‘It has been known, well there was one occasion when we managed to last longer than 15 minutes without so much as a cough, complaint, argument or accidental press of the mute button.
If when this happens it gives me an inner glow and a great bullshit status for Facebook”:
Yayyyy this mama is having quality family time with the kids! Netflix & popcorn at the ready. Love my kids, they’re my world, am the luckiest Mum ever. Oh, lol lol, my kids are the funniest. Feeling blessed. Sibling love. Mothers love. No arguments in this house. My heart goes out to those not so fortunate, I will pray for them. #ditchthosephones
Winching with every word, Dippy 16 asked reporters if the interview could be stopped. He asked his Mum to stop, she’s being ‘weird’.
Carrying on regardless, Mummy Buck, a former ‘80s chick, laughed as she recalled a movie they recently watched together.
“God do you have to talk about that”? asked Dippy. “I should have known what would happen. My first mistake was agreeing to watch it with her. The second, passing her the remote control”
“Every time a fight broke out or there was a drugs scene she would pause it and rattle on about fighting, and how you could end up in prison blah blah blah, basically giving me a life lesson. When a young lad was out brandishing a gun, again it was paused for a life lesson”. Naturally she denied she was giving life lessons.
“The awkwardness was building with every pause. “The moment that cemented this would be our last viewing together for a while was when she pressed the pause button as a couple started going at it outside a club. The last thing I wanted was a life lesson in sex from Mum”!
Ride of Shame
“The embarrassment continues,” said Dippy. “Last weekend my life hung in the balance when riding passenger for 10 minutes”.
“I needed a lift, Mum was the only one available. I had no choice. It would have been okay only she insisted on playing her Country music made worse with her car karaoke, actions and all!
Had I been spotted by any one of my mates, any of them……my life would have been over.
Responding Mummy Buck, a former ’80s chick told reporters: “Wow, wasnt he the lucky one that day then. Thankfully all his friends blessed with Dumbo ears and super-sonic hearing had all been out of range that day” he made it to the Gym reputation intact.
What the Scientists Say
According to a survey carried out by
overpaid bored scientists, its been reported how Teens, after only a brief exposure to things such as smoking and sex were found more likely to engage in this risky behaviour.
Mummy Buck, a former ’80s chick, is hoping this
bullshit works and is planning to momentarily expose her kids to various programmes such as ‘how to keep your room tidy’ or ‘breaking the habit of dropping wet towels’ and sit back and wait as they engage in this unlikely behaviour.
Teenage boy Survey
According to the survey of ‘Everyone’ and ‘Why’? the over 40s are pushing it watching programmes aimed at ‘young people’ only. It’s just ‘weird’ and ‘cringy’.
Unfortunately, Mummy Buck, a former ’80s chick was unavailable for comment on this survey. She was reported to be watching the last episode of Sex Education and looking forward to Season 2.