She lost him at the start!

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She lost him at the start!

I love my Alexa, from the minute she moved in we bonded.  If you asked my fam-a-lam they’d all say Alexa has been brainwashed to only play Chris Country Radio (see a load of rubbish) as soon I enter the room.

Once in a while I up-the-anti, and go all techno asking her to send a message for me, add something to my shopping list (which I never look at it, I just like adding) and hey presto, without so much as a pause she does it all.

I even have a new ‘gadget’ on board.  This ‘gadget’ will supposedly allow me to shut down all attached devices with one command.  The only stumbling block, I need to read the instructions (kids usually do this for me) and they seem to be written in double dutch.

However, I won’t be beaten, I want this to be a surprise for my kids.   I can’t wait to see their faces!!!

Alexa play………..

Cue hubby and his instruction to Alexa to play a bunch of highly paid men waffling on about the should have’s, the almost’s, lame excuses shite, or as he calls it ‘football news’, and the problem starts.

She just doesn’t understand what he’s saying!

*Disclaimer* I’m in no way an Alexa expert, call it a hunch but I reckon if hubby spoke to Alexa as he speaks to all human people he might be onto a winner.

He’s just…..erm misunderstood!

Annoyingly, for him, he sometimes misses the all-important boring ball headlines due to what he describes as ‘technical issues’.  So technical, Alexa with all her knowledge can’t work it out.

Rather than speak to Alexa in his normal voice, he adopts different voice’s, one which sounds like he’s trying to summon the dead with another sounding like he’s having his windpipe squeezed!

He just complicates something that is, well, not complicated!

Anyone else’s husband like this? A friend of ours, who shall remain anonymous, continually calls their Alexa ‘Siri’ and wonders why she doesn’t respond!

The Pain is Real

*Note this is NOT a list of tips & tricks for Alexa.  This is one example of my hubbies attempt at playing Talk Sport, Alexa style*

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Colour Code Ref:      Husband   Alexa    Kid

*said in quick fired succession* ‘Alexa play Talk Sport’
Playing Walk the Talk by Doppelganger.
Eh??? What shit is this’?
It’s Monday the 19th March.
‘bloody woman, I know what day it is! AlexaARRRRR playyyARRRRRR  TalkkkARRRRRRR  SportttARRRRRRR
Playing After School Club.
‘FFS, what’s up with this bloody stupid thing’?
I’d rather not answer that.
‘Right….Alexa,  PLAY……TOOOOOORRRRKKKKKKK  SPOORRRRRRRRRRRRT’
Adding Pork to your shopping list.
‘Shopping list! I didn’t mention bloody shopping’
*Hovers over Alexa, adds Italian accent* Alexa’Arr  Play’Arr  Talk’Arr  Sport’Arr’
Sorry, I don’t know that one.
*eye rolling, accompanied huffing and now he’s shouting* ‘ERRRRR….LEXXXXX…ERRRRR PLAY….ERRRR TALKERRRR SPORTERRRRR on Tunein’.
I could not find a programme called Let’s Play a Tune on a Tin on Tunein.
Seriously?? this Alexa thing is taking the absolute piss now’
She’s going to piss her pants isn’t included with Prime but is available with Amazon music unlimited, would you like to learn more?
‘Alexa you’re bloody stupid’.
You can always send feedback through the feedback app (don’t think he will be doing that any time soon!)
*Desperate shout out for one of the kids* ‘Can you sort this bloody Alexa thing out, I can’t get her to play talk sport for me‘?
*annoyed kid walks in & with normal no frills or special effects voice says* ‘Alexa play Talk Sport’

‘Playing Talk Sport’

and repeat…!

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8 Comments

  1. April 16, 2018 / 5:10 pm

    haha, I am glad I don’t have Alexa she would drive me potty X #LGRTstumble

  2. April 17, 2018 / 4:09 pm

    That’s really funny! I think Alexa is a true woman – with a pathological loathing for football. I’m not sure about all these techno gadgetty things either but I wouldn’t mind a real life Alexa now. #Tweensteensbeyond

  3. April 17, 2018 / 7:22 pm

    This is bloody hilarious I could just see my hubby losing his shit. We don’t have one, with my northern accept and hubby’s dutch one I think it would have a technological breakdown. #tweensteensbeyond

  4. April 18, 2018 / 2:00 am

    lol that’s too funny, i fear my husband would be the same. The teen has one and it drives him mad when i visit getting Alexa to do things for me #tweensteensbeyond

  5. April 19, 2018 / 6:59 pm

    Well I found this hysterical and I don’t even have Alexa. I have, however, had similar experiences with my husband trying to communicate with the voice-controlled sat nav in our car (please bring back maps) and with Siri on his phone. Glad I’m not alone. Thanks so much for joining us at #TweensTeensBeyond

  6. April 20, 2018 / 9:29 pm

    Oh Sharon I loved this. My teens bought me one for my birthday this year as they thought it would be useful whilst I was convalescing. We have had such a laugh with it. The best moments are when you mention Alexa or a word that sounds like it and she jumps into action mode for no reason. I also love the fact that she so frequently doesn’t have an answer for what you need to know! Not sure she is as essential as she is made out to be. #TweensTeensBeyond

  7. April 23, 2018 / 10:48 am

    Ha – Alexa and I haven’t bonded. There I’ve said it. I marvel at how my husband and daughter spend their life ordering this poor woman around. Yet, when I need something – I generally get the sorry, I cannot do that. I’m trying to build a relationship – giving her another chance so to speak but I’m not smitten. Thanks for your humour on this one #tweensteensbeyond

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